My Christmas Wish List

It’s that time of year, again. The trees are up (yes, I meant to make that plural), along with the garland. This year we even have lights up outside for the first time. I’ve started shopping, but I’m not nearly far enough along for there to only be 10 days before Christmas arrives. I guess I know what I’m doing next week.

It’s also the time of year when family asks me what I want. This is always difficult for me. Not because I don’t want anything, but it’s not realistic to ask my family for the items on my list—such as a photo printer capable of printing at least a size 12×12. It’s hard to ask for some of the books I want, because I read a lot on my Kindle these days (the family has agreed to no gift cards—because where’s the fun in that?).

So, just for the fun of the challenge, I thought I’d write up my ultimate Christmas wish list. If anyone can give me any of the items on my list, I’ll give you free signed books for life.

1. Someone to invent shopping carts with homing devices that will follow a shopper home if they don’t return it to the corral.
2. A remote control Elf on the Shelf that will relocate itself each night. Oh, and it would come with an app that would allow me to schedule the time of relocation.
3. Matt Bomer to call me up and say, “Hey, so I hear I’m destined to portray Marcus Kingston on the big screen. Let’s make that happen.”
4. A switch that will instantly transform my daughter’s temper tantrum into a sweet monologue on everything she appreciates in her life.
5. The ability to freeze time. Because really, sometimes I just need more hours in the day.
6. Delicious tasting chocolate that meets my exact carb and protein count, as well as all other required nutritional elements.
7. Justin Timberlake to sing me awake—live—every morning.

What’s on your list?